Thursday, December 18, 2003

ok another long one.

tuesday: was back to work the next day and already at work after reading a lot of mails, comics news, news and some regular boards i visit. and in the afternoon, the cute lady i was working with tells me that our project is shelved for now because of some changes and the launch will now be in february? what the heck, what's wrong with these people, i really hate this when this happens. and in my line of work, it happens a LOT. sometimes it just makes you want to stop working the rest of the day and just... you know...vent/relax... whatever. a few hours later one of the ladies told me that we were launching our celeb xmas and then it's back to work for me.

wednesday: xmas party day, still had to finish the celeb thingy and most of my officemates are already in the party groove, still i was finished by the pm.but had to rush to national to buy gift to my 'anak'. then it was party time, there are almost no people in the office so had to go upstairs already and to my surprise most of the people present are the directors. i was stopped at the entrance because i have to be in costume, so i dah to go to the bathroom and put on my coat and buttoned it old the way, and it look very matrix. damn!

as i went in, they gave me a name tag and i have to be neo 2 because there was already a neo, ok i said, can i just be lestat? sorry, i already wrote neo.oh well. seeing neo 1, i just shook my head,he was in all black an a black jacket. our most beautiful director was kim possible while our boss was indiana jones, the others were mr suave, morticia's sister, ate glowing, neo1. soon people were coming in and was bit disappointed that almost half are not in costume so they had to pick characters from movies who were in civvies, there was lorna t, daboy, a random victim, ping lacson, hehehe. there's a policeman, terrorist, soldiers, cleopatra, lilo, heck almost the whole addams family was there except for uncle fester and that hairy bastard. even the smurfs were there, 4 smurfettes and 1 smurf, bwa ha ha ha. it was a good start until....

prayer, chk. then came the intros. and the presentations of the annual awards, which you could not really be proud of. then they made a presentation about friendster, and it included me, heck these people really like ragging on me, if only i didn't fear being reprimanded/terminated i'm gonna kick all their asses from here to there. they made fun of me and my lovely and 'super bait' na seat mate with the projector showing she was the only one in my friendster. how can that be, that idea borders on the profound/ridiculous/impossible.

is this how you deliver jokes? man talk about low, how really low can these people get. they make fun out of people just to be funny. this is the reason i don't like going to stand-up comedy shows, because i might lose my temper, and losing my temper is really a bad, bad sight to behold, as my barkada can attest to, they don't even do that do me. we use to beat people like these in my younger days, it's a good thing i already mellowed out or else.... they even made fun of the guard when she is not even present, she was only doing her job, following protocol. these people like things easy. and then they don't like it when they are the ones on the receiving end.

and so things went out, giving out those awards, then games, then raffles. they even managed to make the directors dance that otso-otso song. then came the trip to jerusalem. there were 9 pairs. as usual them guys sits on the chair while the women sits on their lap. barely even noticed an officemate commenting on my friend's dress that he likes the way it is cut with a sly smile on his face, which made all the guys laugh, even repeating it while looking at my friend. my friend's face blushed red and was kind of smiling about it and even said "she wish he was a guy".

and on with the contest. first stop of the music, my friend's was the one to sit on my lap, but the emcee's started howling and saying stuff. then second round it was my friend again?! ok maybe it was just chance, and the noise in the background became stronger, then it was another girl. the it was my friend again?! then again?! my friend feeling embarassed from the howls and the razzing of the crowd did not want to go on, so did i. but, hmmm something is fishy going on here, already read it from the start, from the powerpoint presentation of friendster to my being selected as a contestant, which is very unusual for me, then my friend in the trip to jerusalem. man they really sunk sooo loowww. i just kind of loss respect to these guys. didn't think even think about the situation. i am very much married and my friend is really a kind and sweet single girl and now they are turning us into an item?! heaven forbid. nakakahiya naman sa kanya. even mentioning the silohuette (sp?) music which i only played once as far as i can remember, what the fuck? i really wanted to bash some heads back there badly. i know who they are. this thing just didn't happen now, it happened already not once, but twice as far as i can remember. so the dance contest was ended without resolve, and i looked for my friend, and as i expected, she wasn't around anymore. man, i'm really sooo peeved, and these guys are supposed to be her friends too, where's the respect? what's wrong with these people. are they really so blind they they don't see they they are hurting people?!

so after the the contest and raffles were finished and it was declared drinking time. i fixed up my things and said my goodbyes and just went home, disgusted. my other was surprised i was early, i just said i wasn't feeling well, and just tried to forget everything that happened that night.

i fear my friend may not look at me the same way again because of some people's stupidity. i wonder if these people can meet all those gorgeous friends of mine, i just wonder if they will look at me the same way too. and i do have a lot of them from different walks of life. down from the dirty streets of the slums and the beautiful paved roads of those multi million subdivisions? i have mingled with killers, i mean real killers, scum of the society. back when i was an engineer, i also got threats from them and faced them head on which led to drinking sessions. i have mingled with some high profile people who took me to expensive restaurants and places i have never dreamt of going to. i've been here and there, experience a lot of hardships some of them i can't even believe. and i doubt very much if these people will survive what i have gone through still sane and in their right minds. i really doubt it.

sometimes i wonder why i am still in this company, a lot of people i know do too. some people practically gave up on convincing me to join them also. what is the real reason why can't i leave, i really have no idea. is it because of the promise, or do i see a bright light in the days ahead. as of now i really have no idea. but the thing is i'm matured/intelligent/old enough, professional enough to do things my own way. to do my job and deliver on my schedule no matter what. i just need to follow my path whatever is in front of me face it head on. the days of bashing what is in front of me is no longer here. but a friends words haunts me when it comes to things like this....

....kaibigan sa idad mong yan, lumalambot ka na, ang sama nyan, pag kumunat ka na. ganyan ka na habambuhay!

maybe his words are ringing true now, just mabe.

just me


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